Saturday, December 21, 2013

The most annoying questions people ask you when moving to a foreign country

Okay, so you're about to move to a foreign country for whatever reason, and you're super excited! You tell everyone who will listen about your plans, your job, and your living situation.  After you have finished enthusiastically describing every last detail of your future life, you will inevitably be faced with at least one of these incredibly annoying questions:

Why would you want to do that?  

Umm I don't know, because I want to?  Because there are places outside of the US that are actually pretty cool, believe or not.  Because I've been studying French for the majority of my life, and I'm still not fluent.  This question always irritates me because whoever asks it, will never accept any reasons you give, and will always insist that life in the US is way better than anywhere else.  So just make something insane up, and have fun with it. 

When are you going to start your real life?  

I guess I missed the part where this isn't real life? Because I'm going to be an au pair, or a nanny, I get this question a lot.  I've learned that people view traveling and working non-professional jobs as a joke.  Some people in this world just aren't meant to sit at a desk from 9 to 5 -- they want to explore, be adventurous, and experience new things.  Maybe not forever, but maybe, yes, forever. Yes, I am a college graduate, but no I don't want to sell insurance or input data right now.  However, that does not mean that I am wasting my life away and am not a serious person.

OH MY GOD HOW MANY SUITCASES ARE YOU BRINGING??  

There is usually a follow-up question like: "Oh my God, how can you fit ALL your stuff in just two?? I would need at least seventeen." Nope just two, two is enough.

Are you coming home for every insignificant holiday on the calendar?  

St. Patrick's Day, Easter, Fourth of July, COLUMBUS DAY?? Okay, I fully understand why people ask about Christmas, but when people are shocked that, no, I will not be home for my birthday or Cinqo de Mayo, I always wonder if they understand the concept of living abroad.  There's no such thing as a quick trip home not to mention a cheap one.  

When are you getting your car shipped over? 

Okay, someone only asked me this question once, but it was by far the dumbest of them all, so it's making the list.  There's not much you can say to respond to this except:



How do your parents feel about all this?  

They actually want to lock me in the basement for the rest of my life and NEVER LET ME GO.  Umm they're pretty cool about it?  I'm an adult and even if they disapproved, there's really nothing they can do about it?  They want me to lead a cultured, fulfilling life where I'm happy and awesome?  I mean of course they're going to miss me, but it's kinda part of the whole growing up thing that we're all forced to do.  I'm pretty sure everyone I've ever told about my plans has asked this with the same pitiful tone, so *ding ding ding* we have a winner for the most annoying question EVER!


So there they are! I'm sure if anyone else is in the same situation as I am, they hear a handful of these on a pretty daily basis.  I'd love to hear more stupid/annoying questions that you've gotten or just know if I'm the only one who experiences this.  I love comments!

Sunday, November 24, 2013

Tips on Paperwork

After you find your amazing family using my previous post, you will have to start the dreaded French paperwork.  Your family will have to give this paperwork to DIRECCTE (the French employment office) along with some of their own.  When looking websites “explaining” this process you’ll be like:



I found the instructions on aupairworld.net to be less than helpful, and don’t even try emailing them to ask questions – they know nothing! Anyway have no fear, because I've done all the dirty work, and I don’t want anyone else to throw things across their room in frustration like I did.
  1. Go to your doctor, and have them fill out your medical form.  I used this one provided by aupairworld. It may take a few days for your doctor to fill this out and give it back to you, so that’s why I recommend doing it first.  Also, you cannot have your doctor fill out this form more than three months before you leave for France, so don’t start too early.
  2. Get your diploma translated as well as your medical form from your doctor.  If you have graduated from college, get that diploma translated as well as your high school diploma.  I used Rev.com because they only charge $27, and they translate it in within 24 hours.  Don’t bother getting it notarized and mailed to you.  It’s a waste of an extra $20 per document, and it takes forever.
  3. Make a copy of your passport. Because I had to scan all of the documents that I sent to the translator, I also printed them out, and sent them to the family - just in case.
  4. Whenever you receive your contract (my family emailed it to me), print out copies, and sign them.  Also read over your contract carefully!
  5. Write a letter of motivation in French.  This does not need to be perfect, so don’t stress yourself out about it.  I wrote about how I love French culture and literature and how I wanted to improve my French.  I also said that I wanted to eventually use French when I have a full-time job.  You get the gist.
  6. The DIRECCTE website does not state that you need these documents, but they requested them when my family went to drop off my paperwork.  You will need a French CV (I used these templates from about.com) as well as a letter from the French school where you will be attending.  I had to pay a deposit ($320), and then they emailed me the confirmation letter that day.  Also, there is a myth out there that your family will have to enroll you in school, and then they will take the deposit out of your first check.  I was able to do everything myself online, so in my experience, this is not true.  However, the process might differ by school.
  7. Mail all of the documents.  I used a USPS flat rate envelope and got expedited shipping, and my family received it in three business days.  However, it cost me $43 dollars.  I think it was worth it because I am trying to move there in a month and a half but if you have a little more time, you can send the documents a bit cheaper.

As you can see, even getting the paperwork isn't cheap.  All said and done, I spent $504 between translating the documents and getting them notarized, shipping them, and paying for the deposit for school. However, I did sign up for two trimesters at school and I wasted $60 getting those documents notarized.

Saturday, November 23, 2013

How to find an awesome family

After a few interviews from hell (which I will probably post at a later time), I met my incredibly awesome French family who I am unbelievably excited to work for.  Finding a family can be difficult, but I tried to give my advice and tips to maybe make it a little easier for anyone out there trying to be an au pair in Paris. So here it is!

When choosing to be an au pair, you can either try to find a family on your own through non-agency websites or use an agency.

There are a lot of au pair services out there, and they are a great option if:

  1. You don't mind paying their fee (which can range from $150-$600)
  2. You're fine with getting matched up with whatever family the agency finds suitable
  3. You feel more safe with working for a family who has been screened by the agency
  4. You are willing to work for the minimum amount that France requires families to pay their au pairs
  5. You don't feel comfortable with doing the all the paperwork by yourself

I, however, chose to find a family on my own using aupairworld.net.  This site was much more professional and, for lack of a better word, legit than other websites I found.  I highly discourage anyone from using easyaupair.com because I received a lot of messages that turned out to be scams, and the website does little to nothing to deter scammers.

Speaking of scams, there are a lot out there targeted toward au pairs.  You are taking a big risk by moving to another country and living with strangers, so be careful and trust any gut feelings you may have.  A piece of advice - if someone offers you an extreme amount of money for very little work, it's probably a scam.  Especially if the "family" lives in England because Americans can't even au pair there. As a general life rule, if anything seems to good to be true, it probably is.  To find out if the "family" that is emailing you are scammers, I always Googled "the family name + au pair scam" before responding to any family.  However, I have never encountered this on aupairworld.

Anyway, I looked for a family for probably about two months, and I probably sent out 100 applications with only a handful of responses.  However, I got a lot more feedback when I mentioned in my intro message that I was going to be in Paris in November.  If you can, I would definitely recommend doing this because it allows you to better know the family and get a better sense if you like them rather than basing your decision solely on emails and Skype conversations.  Also, you get to see your living arrangements and see how you interact with the kids.  Finally, meeting the family in person gives you a HUGE advantage over all the other girls who sent them applications (I never realized how many girls want to be au pairs)!  Fortunately, I was able to go to Paris because when I studied abroad there, I met friends who I could stay with, so it wasn't too expensive.  And hey, I had an excuse to go on vacation, and who doesn't mind that?

Before I get too far, the most important factor in choosing a family is knowing what you want and what you expect.  Where do you want to live? What kind of living arrangements and working hours do you want?  How many kids do you want to watch?  What kind of weekly salary would you like?  What kind of lifestyle do you want?

These are all really important factors that you should know before you choose a family.  In my case, I have already lived in Paris before, so I wanted to be independent and preferably live in my own apartment. If you have never been away from home or feel uncomfortable being in an unfamiliar city, then maybe living with the family would be a better option.  This also factors into what kind of lifestyle you want.  If you live with the family, you're pretty much on call all the time, and I would imagine you might feel strange about going out at night and coming home late.  With a separate apartment, you can have a little more freedom, experience more nightlife, and not have to worry about work once you leave the house.

Fortunately, I  found a family that actually wants me to be very independent and has rented me a seventh floor walk-up studio... right across the street from the Eiffel Tower! It's a very good situation for me (I mean almost no one would pass up on the location) because both the family and I want a similar experience from me being their au pair. When I met them, I instantly felt comfortable and at home, and I fell in love with their daughter right away (so cute and funny).  So that's how I met my awesome family, and I hope this post helped in some way if you're currently searching for one as well.